| Marriage Advice For New Parents 2 |
The reason why some couples have a difficult time when they first have children is because what they know and don’t know about being married is being tested. If you go out on a sailboat on a beautiful day when the winds are just right and the water is flat, you won’t have any problems. You’ll enjoy the sunshine, the breezes and the company of whomever you are with. But if you didn’t study anything about sailing, other than watching other people sail, and the weather turns and the water gets choppy, you can run into quite a few problems.
Marriage is the same way. What a couple ‘needs to know’ increases dramatically when natural changes occur. A well-trained sailor will actually enjoy the rough seas and strong winds, but one who went out for the first time without so much as reading a manual on sailing will only wish to get back to dry land as quickly as possible. Out of desperation they may even do something really contrary to the basic principles of sailing.
A first child, even before they are born, expands your family by 50%. The complexities of planning for and caring for your new baby are all consuming. It is undeniably frightening to assume the responsibility for a baby who quickly grows through the various stages of childhood. The upcoming challenge makes it too easy to take your mind away from the importance of nurturing and growing the relationship you have with your spouse. For most people who are uninformed about marriage and how a marriage works, the new baby actually becomes a subconscious excuse to not face reality.
Increased security and feelings of closeness should be part and parcel of every marriage. If you are not feeling closer to your spouse and more secure in your relationship, it is time to go back and read “the manual.” Despite what you may have heard, marriage is never supposed to be painful. It is always supposed to be sweet and satisfying. It is your safe harbor from a stormy world.
Paul Friedman’s, http://www.lessonsforahappymarriage.com, entry into the business of helping couples mend their marriages began with a very rough personal experience with divorce. He discovered the truth from his clients:they only sought divorce because the help they found to stay together didn't work.
Read more at http://lessonsforahappymarriage.com/relationship-advice-blog.html,
Article Source: UnArchived Articles
|
|
|
|
